1. |
Invite the Devil to Tea
03:57
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INVITE THE DEVIL TO TEA
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
Strap in
this isn't as dark as it gets
there's always something underneath
always something racking up debt
Always something in the hollows and holes
always something that shrinks from the light
Always something out of focus in the mirror
something you ignore at night
Always a slightly unsatisfied hunger
Always something the other side of your line
Always a tickle on the edge of sleep
Always an itch in the back of your mind
So maybe let it out on a day pass
it could benefit from your generosity
maybe you could both take in a movie
maybe invite your devil to tea
It's our nature to be half angel
it's our nature to be half storm
Who am I to argue with nature
and who are you to tell me I'm wrong
Maybe I'll take him out for a stroll
Maybe I'll take him out and see
Maybe we could throw a cocktail party
Maybe I'll invite my devil to tea
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2. |
Sweetness
01:34
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SWEETNESS
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
If my eyes drift away
they're looking back
at another day
and if sometimes I feel alone
it's only 'cause of the
sweetness that I've know
If my words come out and hurt
it's just the child in me
kicking up dirt
trying to jar all the fireflies I can
so I can hold on to
who I am
If this is the last message you get from me
I sure did like
your company
so much sweetness in my days
it makes the seconds sting
as they slip away
Forgive me if I hold too tight
I'm remembering sweetness
tonight
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3. |
Roy Batty
02:02
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ROY BATTY
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
Roy Batty doesn't know what he's feeling
Roy Batty has seen some things
Roy Batty wants more life, fucker
Roy Batty knows mortality stings
Roy Batty drives a nail through a tendon
Roy Batty thinks there's time enough
Roy Batty uses J.F. Sebastian
Roy Batty kills his creator and stuff
Gotta get it up
gotta get it up
This one is for Pris
you gotta get it up
Roy Batty off the shoulder of Orion
Roy Batty at the Tannhauser Gate
Roy Batty breaks Deckard's fingers
Roy Batty hates his incept date
Gotta get it up
gotta get it up
This one is for Pris
you gotta get it up
Roy Batty the sympathetic figure
Roy Batty the replicant
What is life? What is humanity?
We should ponder but Roy Batty shan't.
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4. |
The Inevitable Sun
02:18
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THE INEVITABLE SUN
5 o'clock in the morning
and nothing is filling the holes
my mind drifts
whichever way the wind blows
This time of the morning
every failure is crystal clear
and everything that held me down
whispers in my ears
Just inside the distance
a jay screams across the sky
yelling out
for its mate or its child
and here I sit
in the dawn's anemic light
waiting for the creeping sun
to touch the sins of the night
I'm so still now
but I'm screaming behind my mouth
when just before dawn
it was loud inside and out
In just a few hours
they'll know what I've done
it'll all fall within the gaze
of the inevitable sun
I prayed for the serenity
to accept what I receive
but it never came easy
and she never believed
6 o'clock in the morning
soon everyone will know
she'll never lose faith again
and my coffee is getting cold
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5. |
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Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Spending small but living large
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
If you got the time I'll show you my scar
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Buy me a burrito and lend me your car
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
Ramen, peanut butter, PBR
it's okay, I'm gonna be a star
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6. |
Six Years in Eden
02:27
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SIX YEARS IN EDEN
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
I'm moving at the speed of numb
in the room where something ate a girl
and for a fire to burn away those moments
there's not enough fuel in the world
So I drink and wait
for all her wonders and signs
and I come to believe in fate
and everything else is just killing time
And I could make a list of monsters
we worked to cut from our hair
during six years in Eden
turning hell into air
But I guess the lie is that Heaven
goes on and on forever
because I've seen its end
and I don't think it gets any better
When I sleep she is in color
Then I wake to the gray and hollow
so I believe she is waiting
for me to have the faith to follow
So I drink and wait
for all her wonders and signs
and I come to believe in fate
and everything else is just killing time
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7. |
I'd Lose a Toe
03:22
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I'D LOSE A TOE
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
For one night with her
I'd lose a toe
her love would be worth it
this I know
take a week off my life
if I could just taste her lips
hell, take two
if I could just touch her hips
Who do I call to make this trade
Bring me the bill so it can be paid
I'd lose a toe
for one night with her
I don't have much
Universe, but let's make a deal
take what you want from me
but just make this real
I don't believe in karma
but do me a solid just once
one magic night
that's not asking too much
It's not a thing I think I deserve
but, Universe, could you throw me a curve
I'd lose a toe
for one night with her
There's no contract I wouldn't sign
to know her love for a moment in time
I'd lose a toe
for one night with her
For one night with her
I'd lose a toe
to have her love me forever
I'd probably sell my soul
put myself into hock
to feel her body next to mine
to know that she loved me
for a few hours one night
In the moonlight, I wait at the crossroads
but the Devil, he never shows
I'd lose a toe
for one night with her
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8. |
Someone To See Me
03:20
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SOMEONE TO SEE ME
Meet my down by the garden wall
in the crack where the sun don't fall
in the shadow of the locust tree
that's where you'll meet the last of me
Find the path that's strangely green
lush and full and built by me
listen for the hollow sound
that's where I'm hiding and can be found
Sorry to call so late
no one else picked up the phone
but you didn't lock the garden gate
and I don't like to be alone
I want someone to see me
and you're the only one that's there
so now were tied and tangled
and I am nesting in your hair
Let my song guide your hand
brown and cold and still and damp
the leaves of years and jailer roots
There's a chill so wear your boots
You'll know me by how wide my smile
And how I'm resting and I'm sessile
Unearthly in an earthy place
where the angels have turned away
When that scream down inside breaks free
then you'll know what's inside of me
howling out from the loam
for someone to take me home
(Chorus)
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9. |
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BEER BOTTLE IN THE BATHROOM TRASH
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
we had a party but they never last
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
this is how things go
the light don't shine in here
not like when I was full of beer
hanging in out at the bottom of the fridge
with all my sud filled sibs
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
we had a party but they never last
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
this is how things go
I guess this is how it ends for me
dropped in here on their way to pee
One last sip before they drop me in
Couldn't find the recycle bin
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
we had a party but they never last
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
this is how things go
I know that I could be
a reminder for an early riser
if they just notice me
the existentialist Budweiser
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
we had a party but they never last
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
this is how things go
I landed here when they gave me a toss
amid the kleenex and the dental floss
I'll accept and won't get bent
they don't own the beer, they only rent
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
we had a party but they never last
Beer bottle in the bathroom trash
this is how things go
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10. |
He Burns Blue
03:40
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HE BURNS BLUE
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
He burns blue
says "I'm afraid I have to leave you."
"I know you're not ready but it's true.
There's nothing we can do."
He burns blue
He burns dim
"I've loved you from the moment you let me in.
Love's not a game any of us can win
'cause we can't see the end from where we begin."
He burns dim
He turns to mist
every moment of his life is in her kiss
rings around the moon on a night like this
shoot into the sky in a moment's gliss
he turns to mist
He drifts out
From the lines and the confines, the dread and the doubt
All the fear he kept inside his mouth
Nobody's hands can hold him now
He drifts out
He burns blue
not touching the things he's passing through
Amazed by the way his body moves
as he burns off all the pain he ever knew
he burns blue
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11. |
Weaponized Milkshakes
03:34
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WEAPONIZED MILKSHAKES
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
Wish I could dip my hands into the flow
strain the mud and separate
the pyrite from the gold
and only pull the worthy and the holy into my boat
but we're all drinking weaponized milkshakes now
and setting fire to the road
This is my sand, this is my line this is where I'm from
my gadgets are getting smart
while my arguments are getting dumb
I get confused now between nutmeg and yellow cake uranium
but we're politicizing poultry
in a game that's zero sum
Always swinging for the fences
always sweating the little things
everybody ran on stage
and there's nobody in the wings
I'm just a guy with with a guitar and a somewhat tender ear
I won't pretend
I have any answers here
All can do it is relay what I fear
like we've driven off the cliff
still arguing about who gets to steer
They say Scipio wept as he sowed salt
because he knew
every Empire must fall
Earth and time conspire against every wall
so between milkshakes and oblivion
there's a place for us all
we're safe in bed tonight
but I think there's something coming up the hall
I'll see you later, mom
I'm going to hang out at the mall
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12. |
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ONE LAST FUCK IN THE CHAMBER
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
you can hold your breath and stomp
your feet 'til you Goddamn face turns blue
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
Karma's not an assassin
and I'm not giving it its due
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
There's nothing that'll come out of your mouth
that's gonna change my view
I got one last fuck in the chamber
and I'm not giving it to you
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13. |
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Let's pretend it's Christmas.
We can talk in bed in hushed tones,
listening for noises on the roof.
We can giggle and pretend that
the knots in our stomache are butterflies of excitement
for the presents we'll find in the morning.
We can keep each other awake by whispering "you still awake?".
I'll put some carols in the CD player and
pretend they are playing all night on a transistor radio
wedged between the bed and the wall.
We can laugh and then stop to listen because you thought you heard him on the roof.
Let's pretend it's Christmas.
We can creep out the door and down the hall.
We can imagine that the pile of bills
are all cards we are waiting to open in the morning.
Then an imagined mother shoos us back to bed, giggling right along with us.
'Did you see anything?'
"No, he won't be here until they go to bed.'
'Sheesh, why are they staying up?'
Let's pretend it's Christmas and huddle under the covers,
saying who had been better this year.
We can try to predict what we will get .
We can try to transform bills and repairs into puppies and video games in our minds.
We can hate not knowing but love the surprise.
Let's pretend it's Christmas
and burst into the living room.
We can jump up and down on the pull out bed that mom and dad slept on.
We can yell and shout and count how many of the invisible presents are yours and how many our mine.
Then we can drink hot chocolate and fall asleep on the couch, surrounded by the shredded,
imaginary wrapping paper.
Our heads resting against each other.
Tonight, let's pretend it's Christmas -
one more time, before we forget.
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14. |
Tommy Wiseau
02:35
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TOMMY WISEAU
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
I don't know how far this will go
don't know if I will place or show
but I dream fast and life moves slow
so I pray to Tommy Wiseau
I don't know if this is any good
or has the right engine under the hood
but I have loved it as much as I could
so I offer up thanks to Edward D. Wood
Their names ring clear because they showed no fear
they couldn't hide their art on the inside
to our shame, we laugh just the same
but we'll remember their names
we'll remember their names
When I feel I can't go on anymore
when my belief shakes and falls to the floor
when the world scoffs and slams the door
I always think of Rudy Ray Moore
I don't know how far this will go
don't know if I will place or show
but I dream fast and life moves slow
so I pray to Tommy Wiseau
When I need a little bit of luck
I rub my tape of Howard the Duck
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15. |
The Great, Wide Mundane
03:46
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THE GREAT, WIDE MUNDANE
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
The shape of risk
is cloudy now
cloudy now
and mere mortals
stupid with gray
fall in
they find the graver cost
of candy floss
and glycerine
so hard to be good
hard to be good
they chalk it up
to rings in the wood
but it's fear
there's not much air
between there and here
I met a man
coming the other way
he said
"I'm mostly regret now.
the rest is whiskey and clay"
I asked "what are you doing here?"
He said "Tracing back my path
to a day when I was clear.
There wasn't much air
between there and here
I get cold
so easy now
and the good days
when they come
don't want to hang around
I can take
grief and pain
I just can't stare down
the great, wide
mundane
The great, wide
mundane
I want you here
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16. |
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I KILLED 3 HOBOS IN HIGH SCHOOL
(words and music by E.P. Schwartz)
She said "I killed 3 hobos in high school"
"And now nobody knows but you"
She was just so beautiful
Her words weren't really getting through
Now I'm sitting in this bank vault
wondering where it all went wrong
Should have done this, should have done that
and where my had my new love gone
She said she burned her town's hall of records
so no one knows who her parents were
I thought "What an interesting conversation
I can't believe I'm at the Cheesecake Factory with her"
Now I'm sitting in this jail cell
wondering if I should have stayed home
I'm wiping ink off my finger tips
Why won't my mom answer the phone
She said "I want a man who can go the distance.
I want a man who can take the fall"
I said "Me, baby, you know I'm falling."
I don't think that's what she meant at all
Now I'm sitting in this courtroom
choosing between love and a deal
they say it's better to have loved and lost
but that doesn't mean that I won't squeal
I throw myself on the mercy of the court
there was evil in her heart but her skirt was short
How was I supposed to cut and run
the devil's lips tasted like bubble gum
She kissed so good
it was probably the only thing good about her
I looked evil in the eye
and I fell, I won't deny
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Eric Peter Schwartz Aurora, Illinois
Acoustic rock and some instrumental rock. Where heart and quirk collide.
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